Closed Roads, Open Futures | Nerd Fitness

I’m a big fan of Stephen King.

I have read the entire Dark Tower Series, It, The Shining, Doctor Sleep, and my favorite movie is based on his novella, Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption.

So, at the request of many friends who told me this was their favorite book, I finally did thatstarted reading 11/22/63that.

Here’s why it blows your mind:

On November 22, 1963, three shots rang out in Dallas, President Kennedy died, and the world changed.

What if you could change it back?

Stephen King’s heart-stopping new novel about a man who travels back in time to prevent JFK’s assassination—a thousand-page tour de force.

Like every good nerd, I dedicate a lot of brain power to hypothetical time travel, the butterfly effect, and changing the past. I bet you have too.

Time travel is an attractive idea because our brains can’t stop thinking about “the road less traveled” and “what if I had done X instead of Y?”

Which brings me to the topic of today’s newsletter.

Accepting that some paths are closed is very freeing.

Some Roads are Closed

My friend Tim Urban at thatWaitButWhy.comthat lay out this graph about the life choices we’ve made so far, and the branching paths open to us tomorrow:

It’s very easy for our brains to hyperfocus on all the dark lines of our past: the roads closed to us, the decisions we didn’t make, the decisions we made and how it felt our lives are “determined” today.

“Because of how I used to do it, that’s just the way things are.”

“I’m ashamed that I never did XYZ, now it’s too late. I am so sorry!”

“I shouldn’t be happy because of this mistake I made”

We often forget that it is only possible to connect the dots of our lives looking back, where we make every decision with the best information we have at the time.

(If you’re looking for a solid read, by Matt Haig thatThe Midnight Librarythat is a thought-provoking fictional story about alternative paths in life and acceptance. Haig draws from a past thatdecision that almost killed himselfthat.)

So let’s talk a little bit about black lines and green possibilities.

Maybe some roads are closed!

I bring all this up to make two points.

Author Chris Guillbeau, who greatly inspired my love of travel and influenced how I built Nerd Fitness, released an essay recently about thatcelebrate behind closed doorsthat.

We’ve all heard stories about people starting certain careers later in life.

An example is, “It’s not too late! Samuel L. Jackson didn’t get his breakthrough role in “Pulp Fiction” until he was 46.

And Chris points out that sometimes… it’s too late:

While these stories are inspiring, the lesson that “it’s never too late” is not universal. Sometimes it’s too late! To believe otherwise is to believe a fantasy.

Some things in life have real deadlines—not all, but some.

In other words, sometimes we always hold on to something that we know we can do “someday,” and maybe we refuse to accept the fact that…yes, it’s too late.

Maybe we keep holding on to the hope that we will eventually run a marathon…even if we don’t.

Maybe we’re still holding on to the hope that we’ll write that cookbook…even if we don’t like to cook anymore.

We may decide that certain roads are closed to us. We can accept this.

The Future is not set in Stone either

A few weeks ago, I wrote about how thatThe Past is not Set in Stonethatbecause our perception of the story has changed.

It’s okay to accept that maybe what we dreamed of in our 20s is okay to die.

However, it is also sad to think that it is “too late” to make any changes in our future, and that it is already determined.

Betrand Russel once said “You are not obligated to be who you were five minutes ago.”

As Chris says:

“It’s never too late” for many things, and that’s fine. But sometimes it is, and that’s okay.

It’s never too late to learn something new. It’s never too late to try new things.

But it may be too late for certain channels, and that’s okay.

Indeed, it should be celebrated.

Leaving some paths, or accepting that some paths may be closed to us leaves space to make a different decision for the continuation of life.

You can decide later today to:

• start powerlifting
• take an online class for a new career.
• try a new hobby.
• talk to your doctor about thatweight loss aidthat.

We can’t travel back in time to stop the Kennedy assassination.

Some of the paths of life are now closed to us.

That might be okay!

Instead of spending more brain power regretting our closed black paths, we can work on deciding which green path to take next.

-Steve

PS: Need guidance and accountability to reach your fitness goals? Nerd Fitness has helped 10,000+ people over the past 8 years with 1-on-1 online fitness coaching. thatClick here for more detailsthat.